Naming and Naming Conventions
Posted by garth on 21 Jun 2009 at 02:28 pm | Tagged as: chickens, ducks
Like a lot of farmers, we don’t name the poultry or other livestock. They’re wonderful creatures and we love them very much a desire nothing more than the happiest possible life until we kill and eat them. This requires some mental gymnastics for city folk and former vegetarians. One thing I’ve found very interesting in raising poultry is that they lack the empathy for humans shown by dogs, horses, and even cats. (Yes, cats are hateful and contemptuous, but that’s because they understand how you feel AND THEY WANT TO PUNISH YOU!)
However, we’re also animal people and we need to refer to our various groups of animals as something, so they evolve names. We couldn’t remember the name of the breed “Wyandotte,” so our first one was referred to as Wilhemina (We’d been reading the League of Extraordinary Gentleman), and the Black Austrolorpes as “the Octothorpes”. The Khaki Campbell ducks have generally been referred to as “those fracking ducks.” They are not my favorite animals to work with but we’ve got the new ones this year known as “the ducklings” or “those misbegotten creatures.”
Our new chickens this year are the Ameraucanas (who lay blue eggs) and four new Wyandottes. 
Pretty, aren’t they? So they reminded us of the humanoid cylons from Battlestar Galactica. Did I mention we’re nerds?
There are many copies. And they have a plan.
In deference to my previous career as an alt country musician, the Ameraucanas are referred to simply as Uncle Tupelo.
The two that hate each other are clearly Chicken Jeff Tweedy and Chicken Jay Farrar. Chicken Jay Bennet is playing a guitar solo in Chicken Heavan.
Dear chicken people-
I was at a party this weekend and someone was trying to impress me with their chicken knowledge. They said that brown chickens laid brown eggs and white chickens laid white eggs. I responded with, “What about the blue eggs?” and they looked quite stymied. So, is this simple fact true?
Sincerely,
a non chicken person
Dear ANCP,
No.
Thanks for reading,
Lauren
—
No, seriously, absolutely made up. One of these days I will get a picture of the whole lineup, but we have two black chickens, one red chicken, three white-and-black-spangled chickens, two goldish-and-black-spangled chickens, and the three tan/grey/black whatever mutts pictured above (the Ameraucanas). They all lay brown eggs except the Ameraucanas, whose eggs should be blue/greenish, but since they are mutts we will have to see what we get. I know some Ameraucanas who lay pale brown to pinkish.
So, yeah, nice try, but no.
Such cute chickens!!! :D
I get too attached to animals so I don’t think I’ll ever be able to butcher mine :( I’ll let them lay eggs for as long as they like and if they stop laying, they will simply be my outdoor pets lol.
~Cynthia
Did Jay go and start another brood that laid some decent eggs? Then Jeff started his own that laid some really fantastic eggs you could eat over and over again, and then some ho-hum ones that just taste like they came from a factory farm? I’m just curious.
And with that, Neville wins the internet! Well played.
Having birds named for Uncle Tupelo is downright awesome.